"written in my DNA"

I see old nick's found his 21st century nick-name, "DNA"!

Daniel heslop, Bournemouth, UK

Truth is good, but love is better.

Vassily Grossman, London, England

My desire to to chase any women I fancy is written in my DNA as it is written in every mans DNA. I feel no remorse or regret for what is part of my God given nature.

harry, london, UK

I had a brief affair with a work colleague. It was wrong and I shouldn't have done it but I felt more alive in that short period than I ever have in my marriage. We ended the affair because we both have families and responsibilities but it's made me realise how boring and ugly my wife really is.

JB, London, UK

I had a sordid unnecessary internet affair of which I am deeply ashamed.One year later,after an abortion and a vasectomy ,my wife is doing exactly the same to me.I have told her to go and do it, I love her and I have to let her go to make her come back to me.

mark, immingham, lincs

The married for life thing is tricky to avoid.

Monogamy was invented when life expectancy was 40-50.

The first five years can be fun.

Then the kids come along and you stay married for them. Thats 25 years gone.

By then you are too old to really think about messing about and you stay married.

David, Dubai, UAE

When and why is british society excepting the truth that no longer is a marriage for life! I believe that if you in a relationship you must respect your partner other wise you just de grading yourself to a level of scum. Also he wont accept you back and if he does you can bet he wont be loyaly.

Betty, Aylesbury,

The problem is, Carrie, that if you were the one in the affair the outcome would still be the same. Men have to be wary of this, unless they are on a low income, are a better father (e.g. the mother is an alcoholic) and renting instead of owning a house.

Howard, Manchester,

As a single woman, if I want to sleep with a man who has a girlfriend, i will (just so long as I don't know her!). I have no one to protect, he does and should but his conscience is not my responsibility.

However, if i wanted to sleep with a married man.......i wouldn't.

Jackie, london,

To keep yourself from all this trouble just don't have affairs! There is always a moment where you decide - to give in or to stop yourself. Its about control and respect - for yourself and for your partner. Simple.

Sandra Rogers, Liverpool,

The first degree of unfaithfulnesss is mental. When that comes you should ask yourself why, what is wrong and missing in your current relationship. If it isn't the right one, leave! Once you're free you may do as you please, no-one hurt.

Yourself is the only one you must live with all your life.

Cristina Falkenberg, Madrid, Spain

JGC - the vast majority of divorce petitions are not based on the "infidelity" ground, but "unreasonable behaviour".

Nonsense. The vast majority of divorce cases are raised on length of separation grounds. In any event UB is easier and cheaper to prove than adultery.

Jules, Edinburgh,

Pittman's analysis is incomplete. Plenty of affairs are simply the result of boredom, and the reality that familiarity often kills interest and excitement. Our evolution did not drive us towards marriage, but towards child-rearing. Lifetime fidelity is a late development in human society.

Paul Freeman, London, England

David P Hall seems to be of the opinion that supporting a child can be achieved by money alone. How immature! I bet he would not be so laissez faire if he was the one who had to bring the child up.

Miriam, Villebois Lavalette, France

How about applying the principals of the 10 commandments so as not to have the affair in the first place eh? Why cross the line that should not be crossed only to cause misery to yourself and others. If society today encourages self-centeredness why not apply the principals that help prevent them?

Manny, London, UK

A threesome to celebrate your 60th: Surely that can't be considered adultery.

Andrew Milner, Karuizawa, Japan

But, David, if any form of trust or respect is involved, being married or not doesn't matter. Marriage is essentially the icing on the cake of a good relationship, and being unmarried does not mean that you are therefore free from all the responsibilities of trust and fidelity in a relationship.

Matt, Edinburgh, UK

And finally...if you are ending a relationship BECAUSE of an affair, have the courage to admit it.

kate, london,

But if you never marry you can have all the affairs that come your way. No shame, no guilt, no financial penalty, AND you get to meet so many interesting people. You can still have children as long as you support them, by different partners if you like. You can fall in love. Why ever get married?

David P Hall, Bangkok, Thailand

How very compassionate Carrie, London

Chris, London,

It is a mistake to ever underestimate the power of lust.

Peter Ryder, Middlewich, UK

"Extra-marital affairs remain the biggest cause for divorce, according to the UK management consultants Grant Thornton"

But from a perspective of family law, the vast majority of divorce petitions are not based on the "infidelity" ground, but "unreasonable behaviour".

JGC, London, UK

"the philanderer (men who continually need their masculinity affirmed, women who are the daughters or ex-wives of philanderers) "
So the philandering woman is only that way because of a man? No naturally philandering women, they've just been twisted by the men in their lives? What a sexist attitude!

Ali H, Exeter,

I divorced my Husband, after an internet affair, that went too far. It cost him his home, car, wife kids [in that order, from him!]
So, I don't doubt they don't want to Divorce when well off.
Should have thought of that before they do it!! He has yet to marry her.

Carrie, London,